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Loser of the Year
Nov. 30th, 2020 08:50 pm“You're helping that loser!?”
The door slammed, startling Miriam and ruining the hair pouf she was trying to make with her bangs. She grimaced and let out a sigh and started again. “Whrat lurser?” She said around the bobby pin poking out of her beak.
Hadassah stood behind her with her arms crossed and a scowl on her face. “The one you're tutoring.”
“I tutor a lot of people, Hady, it's my job.” Miriam tucked down a few flyaways and carefully combed and smoothed her hair. Then she aimed a finger gun at her reflection with a wink and a tongue click. Hady rolled her eyes.
“The one you're tutoring today.”
“That narrows it down less than you think. I have like four appointments today.” She edged past her friend and made for the coffee maker, mini-fridge, and microwave that passed as a minimalist kitchenette.
“Ughh, are you going to make me say his name?”
“That would be very helpful. Although,” she paused and looked up from the thermos she was filling with coffee and Swiss Miss, “that does narrow it down a little. I think three of today's are boys.”
“Uppercrust.” Hadassah made a face when she said it, as though the name were some awful tasting thing that made her mouth form a protective saliva barrier that she wanted to spit out in a sink.
A long moment passed during which the only sound was the thermos filling up while Miriam blinked at the expression on Hady's face.
“........nope, not ringing any bells.”
“What do you mean, 'not ringing any bells'? You're tutoring him to-day!”
“Well yeah, he's on the list, but I don't know who he is or why he's a loser.” Miriam sat down at her desk with a piece of microwaved quiche and some kielbasa and tried to read a magazine. Hady sat on the end of her bed and leaned into her space.
“He's literally the cheatiest cheater who ever cheated.”
“If he's that good, he wouldn't need my help.”
“I mean at sports, Mir!”
“You know I don't know what those are.”
“He and his team wrecked the X-Games? There was that big fire and all that stuff about sabotaging the other teams?”
Miriam finally looked up from her magazine with wide eyes. “That guy?”
“That guy.”
“Wow.” She went back to her magazine.
“What, that's it? Just 'wow'? The guy is a sleazeball and a cheater and a snooty fake jerk!”
“Wow, you really hate this guy.”
“Um, yeah. Everyone does. You should.”
Miriam got up with a sigh and took her dishes out to the communal kitchen to wash. “I've never even met the guy, Hady.”
“Wrong!" Hady swung a pointing finger in the air triumphantly, “You have met him. He smashed your balloon!”
“What're you-” But Miriam cut herself off with a slow gasp of realization and let her hands fall limp on the counter, soapy water puddling around her fingers. “No.”
“Yes.”
“No.” She frowned and clenched the sponge, which squirted dirty water directly at her glasses, and she shook her head to clear them. “Hady,” she said, turning around and leaning against the sink. There was a pause and she looked like she was thinking about how to word something. “...Charity doesn't come with conditions.”
Contrary to the intended response, this delighted Hady. “Oh, wow! That's a good one, he's gonna love hearing he's a charity case.”
“That's not what I meant and you know it. Look. I'm not going to cancel on the guy. Tutoring is my job, and whatever he did doesn't change that.”
Hady flung herself into a wooden chair with a temper. “He's just using you to look like he's trying, Mir, and it's probably a waste of time, anyway.”
“First: wow, harsh. Don't forget who helped you through materials chemistry. Was that a waste of time?”
“No...” Hady grumbled.
“No, well, you sure thought so when finals rolled around.”
“But he is using you,” she said seriously. “You know that, right?”
“That is okay. I'm not offended.”
“But-”
“Charity doesn't come with conditions.” Miriam repeated. She shrugged and put her plate and fork in the drying rack. “I don't get to tell someone what to do with what I give them, whether it's a couple hours in an afternoon twice a week, or five bucks that I think is going to buy a sandwich, but gets spent on beer. It's not my business. Besides, he was banned from future games and I heard he was practically launched into the stratosphere by one of his own team mates. Geez. Time served, don'tcha think?”
“He should've been expelled."
"You're really gunning for the ol' Ozymandias treatment, huh?"
Hady didn't know what that meant, so she ignored it. "Listen. Mir, just...I don't want you to get hurt. Just be careful around this guy, okay?”
She laughed, “It's a tutoring session, not a date!”
“Ew! Gross, I know, it's just he has this...sleazy way of...of-”
“What, seducing innocent nerds?” Miriam grinned.
“Aughh! Stop!” Hady clapped her hands over her ears.
“We're gonna go to Vegas for a flash wedding and have lots of snooty, athletic babies.”
By now, both girls were laughing hysterically. “I just threw up in my mouth, dude! Oh, you're so nasty!” When the giggles died down, Hady got up to stand next to her friend. “Really, though. Really. Be careful. He's got a reputation for being manipulative and great at starting rumors.”
Miriam wrapped one arm around Hady and leaned her head on her shoulder. “I won't get on the scary monster's bad side.”
“Promise?”
“Promise promise.” She held her little finger out for a pinky swear and pushed away from the counter. “In the meantime,” Miriam said as she shouldered her backpack, “I would love to sit around drinking coffee with you all day and gossiping about how much I hate some guy who's totally the worst, but if I don't get out of here, I'm going to be late for class.”
“Don't forget your thermos.”
“Got it right here, mama.”
“And don't forget that whatever he says...it's an act.”
Miriam just smiled and left, determined to make as though she had absolutely no idea who he was. Which was mostly true. Later, she would walk into a small conference room where a young man was already hunched over two open text books and a number of scribbled on note pages. He didn't look up when she came in. She smiled anyway and put her thermos and backpack down.
"Hi, Bradley. I'm Miriam. You're here for Greco-Roman political history, right?"
The door slammed, startling Miriam and ruining the hair pouf she was trying to make with her bangs. She grimaced and let out a sigh and started again. “Whrat lurser?” She said around the bobby pin poking out of her beak.
Hadassah stood behind her with her arms crossed and a scowl on her face. “The one you're tutoring.”
“I tutor a lot of people, Hady, it's my job.” Miriam tucked down a few flyaways and carefully combed and smoothed her hair. Then she aimed a finger gun at her reflection with a wink and a tongue click. Hady rolled her eyes.
“The one you're tutoring today.”
“That narrows it down less than you think. I have like four appointments today.” She edged past her friend and made for the coffee maker, mini-fridge, and microwave that passed as a minimalist kitchenette.
“Ughh, are you going to make me say his name?”
“That would be very helpful. Although,” she paused and looked up from the thermos she was filling with coffee and Swiss Miss, “that does narrow it down a little. I think three of today's are boys.”
“Uppercrust.” Hadassah made a face when she said it, as though the name were some awful tasting thing that made her mouth form a protective saliva barrier that she wanted to spit out in a sink.
A long moment passed during which the only sound was the thermos filling up while Miriam blinked at the expression on Hady's face.
“........nope, not ringing any bells.”
“What do you mean, 'not ringing any bells'? You're tutoring him to-day!”
“Well yeah, he's on the list, but I don't know who he is or why he's a loser.” Miriam sat down at her desk with a piece of microwaved quiche and some kielbasa and tried to read a magazine. Hady sat on the end of her bed and leaned into her space.
“He's literally the cheatiest cheater who ever cheated.”
“If he's that good, he wouldn't need my help.”
“I mean at sports, Mir!”
“You know I don't know what those are.”
“He and his team wrecked the X-Games? There was that big fire and all that stuff about sabotaging the other teams?”
Miriam finally looked up from her magazine with wide eyes. “That guy?”
“That guy.”
“Wow.” She went back to her magazine.
“What, that's it? Just 'wow'? The guy is a sleazeball and a cheater and a snooty fake jerk!”
“Wow, you really hate this guy.”
“Um, yeah. Everyone does. You should.”
Miriam got up with a sigh and took her dishes out to the communal kitchen to wash. “I've never even met the guy, Hady.”
“Wrong!" Hady swung a pointing finger in the air triumphantly, “You have met him. He smashed your balloon!”
“What're you-” But Miriam cut herself off with a slow gasp of realization and let her hands fall limp on the counter, soapy water puddling around her fingers. “No.”
“Yes.”
“No.” She frowned and clenched the sponge, which squirted dirty water directly at her glasses, and she shook her head to clear them. “Hady,” she said, turning around and leaning against the sink. There was a pause and she looked like she was thinking about how to word something. “...Charity doesn't come with conditions.”
Contrary to the intended response, this delighted Hady. “Oh, wow! That's a good one, he's gonna love hearing he's a charity case.”
“That's not what I meant and you know it. Look. I'm not going to cancel on the guy. Tutoring is my job, and whatever he did doesn't change that.”
Hady flung herself into a wooden chair with a temper. “He's just using you to look like he's trying, Mir, and it's probably a waste of time, anyway.”
“First: wow, harsh. Don't forget who helped you through materials chemistry. Was that a waste of time?”
“No...” Hady grumbled.
“No, well, you sure thought so when finals rolled around.”
“But he is using you,” she said seriously. “You know that, right?”
“That is okay. I'm not offended.”
“But-”
“Charity doesn't come with conditions.” Miriam repeated. She shrugged and put her plate and fork in the drying rack. “I don't get to tell someone what to do with what I give them, whether it's a couple hours in an afternoon twice a week, or five bucks that I think is going to buy a sandwich, but gets spent on beer. It's not my business. Besides, he was banned from future games and I heard he was practically launched into the stratosphere by one of his own team mates. Geez. Time served, don'tcha think?”
“He should've been expelled."
"You're really gunning for the ol' Ozymandias treatment, huh?"
Hady didn't know what that meant, so she ignored it. "Listen. Mir, just...I don't want you to get hurt. Just be careful around this guy, okay?”
She laughed, “It's a tutoring session, not a date!”
“Ew! Gross, I know, it's just he has this...sleazy way of...of-”
“What, seducing innocent nerds?” Miriam grinned.
“Aughh! Stop!” Hady clapped her hands over her ears.
“We're gonna go to Vegas for a flash wedding and have lots of snooty, athletic babies.”
By now, both girls were laughing hysterically. “I just threw up in my mouth, dude! Oh, you're so nasty!” When the giggles died down, Hady got up to stand next to her friend. “Really, though. Really. Be careful. He's got a reputation for being manipulative and great at starting rumors.”
Miriam wrapped one arm around Hady and leaned her head on her shoulder. “I won't get on the scary monster's bad side.”
“Promise?”
“Promise promise.” She held her little finger out for a pinky swear and pushed away from the counter. “In the meantime,” Miriam said as she shouldered her backpack, “I would love to sit around drinking coffee with you all day and gossiping about how much I hate some guy who's totally the worst, but if I don't get out of here, I'm going to be late for class.”
“Don't forget your thermos.”
“Got it right here, mama.”
“And don't forget that whatever he says...it's an act.”
Miriam just smiled and left, determined to make as though she had absolutely no idea who he was. Which was mostly true. Later, she would walk into a small conference room where a young man was already hunched over two open text books and a number of scribbled on note pages. He didn't look up when she came in. She smiled anyway and put her thermos and backpack down.
"Hi, Bradley. I'm Miriam. You're here for Greco-Roman political history, right?"